When we share our sadness, we are our most open and undefended Joy’s smile is much closer to tears than it is to laughter. —Victor Hugo, Hernani We often retreat from love when it unconsciously arouses painful feelings of sadness. This is not the kind of sadness that comes when our feelings are hurt or our heart is broken. That sadness makes sense to us. This type of sadness is perplexing because it is aroused when we are treated with kindness and compassion and sensitivity.